Players: 1. Ana Drobot (Bucharest, Romania); 2. Ernesto P. Santiago, Greece; 3. Mona Iordan, ROMANIA; 4. Damir Damir, Montenegro; 5. Marina Bellini, Italy; 6. Henryk Czempiel, Poland; 7. Giovanna Restuccia, Italy; 8. Pat Geyer, USA; 9. Brendon Kent, England; 10. Florin Golban, Romania; 11. Marta Chocilowska, Poland; 12. Cristina Apetrei, Romania; 13. Cezar Florescu, Romania; 14. Stella Pierides, DE; 15.Mark Gilbert, UK; 16. Eddie Lee, Germany
planted four inches apart
--Mark Gilbert, UK
VOTE: 223*** SCORE: 15
COMMENT: Excellent. I especially appreciate how you've made "the wait" into something concrete that the reader can observe, waiting alongside you.
confined at home...
again around the world
with Phileas Fogg
VOTE: 313*** SCORE: 14
COMMENT: Reading always helps us escape on bad days, all the more so today. Fine contrast between the imaginary travel around the world and our house arrest.
COMMENT 2:The imagination compensates for what is missing in reality. We fulfill our needs in dreams and fantasies
COMMENT 3: I enjoyed your literary reference, and the little lift in the last line.
COMMENT 4: Takes me back to my childhood
my bouquet of flowers
on the doorstep
--Brendon Kent, England
VOTE:512*** SCORE: 13
COMMENT: In these days, the distance from our loved ones is enduring, especially if they are old and alone; even a little gesture can bring them happiness.
COMMENT:Touching and effective
only his warm words
--Ana Drobot (Bucharest, Romania)
VOTE: 3***** SCORE: 03
from room to room she carries
--Ernesto P. Santiago, Greece
VOTE: 11**** SCORE:03
COMMENT: how sad... in these times the only way to trip is via Internet... social distancing forces us to stay home and dream with open eyes... no dream journey is possible... carrying passwords from room to room highlights the alienation of man who try to find a solution...
COMMENT 2: I like that this demands a bit more of the reader, opening up more than one possibility for interpretation with interesting implications for family dynamics during this challenging time.
my daughter’s birthday -
I show her the present
via the video chat
Mona Iordan, Romania
VOTE: 2***** SCORE: 02
hides in the pines
a jailbird song
--Damir Damir, Montenegro
VOTE: *31*** SCORE: 09
COMMENT: A well-written haiku, that leaves space to ponder; is it the Sun or is it the song which is hiding? In both readings, we have the feeling of something good that is out of reach, for the present.
COMMENT2: Fresh and evocative, this haiku really swings. I appreciate your play on the spring kigo in "jailbird song".
from one window to another
songs of hope
---Marina Bellini - Italy
VOTE:1*1*** SCORE: 04
COMMENT: Lovely, upbuilding images. One can imagine a lone singer moving from window to window to observe spring's flowering; at the same time this evokes the touching exchange of song happening "from window to window" in Italy.
--Henryk Czempiel, Poland
VOTE: 11**** SCORE: 03
COMMENT: Dynamic, layered implications for the impact on families, nations, and political alliances. This minimalistic poem packs a lot of power.
on the smartphone
he is embracing me
--Giovanna Restuccia, Italy
VOTE: 1***** SCORE: 01
often seem closer
--Pat Geyer, East Brunswick, NJ
VOTE:1***** SCORE: 01
COMMENT: A poignant take on the theme.
the cock's song
in D minor
--Florin Golban, Bucuresti, Romania
VOTE: 221*** SCORE:09
COMMENT: I must confess I had to find out what D minor is, discovering that it’s considered the saddest key; so all the poem comes alive, giving a strong sense of melancholy.
COMMENT 2:Through the anxieties of this lockdown, life outside in nature's world carries on...a light-hearted haiku trying to make light of a heavy situation. Nice 'sonic' tone in this brief poem.
COMMENT: I don't think you can say what scale a rooster is using, but I think the idea is that the bird also suffers due to the pandemic too or maybe the man hears it in a different way than as usually, making a shrill noise, to show that he no longer tolerates the self-isolation...
blossoming almond branch
against a sky
--Marta Chocilowska, Poland
VOTE: 1***** SCORE: 01
the plum tree near the window
my only friend
VOTE: 121*** SCORE: 08
COMMENT: The isolation imposed can make a person sick... man is not accustomed to stay at home as in a cage, that's why looks for help from nature. a blossomed tree next to the window is a way to don not become insane... its image is a lesson of survival...
full pink moon
the mourning dove’s call
for its mate
--Stella Pierides, Neusaess, DE
VOTE: 13**** SCORE: 07
COMMENT: The first part denotes hope, and the second part tells us again that nature does not give up. Further, how romantic this scene is! On a pink background a bird calls for a partner. the instinct of pairing is not affected. The show must continue in the direction imposed by mother nature, now and here...
echoes of touch
limb upon limb
of wild plum
Eddy Lee; Germany
VOTE:*1**** SCORE: 02
COMMENT: Dense with pleasing word-sounds
Thanks to all players. This was such a fine kukai. All submissions were on time. All ballots were on time. And players took the time to send many comments, which is always good way of encouraging fellow writersReplyDelete
gillena cox; Founder/coordinator - Caribbean Kigo Kukai
Welcome: Florin Golban & Eddy Lee, Thank you for choosing Caribbean Kigo Kukai.ReplyDelete
Our very first kukai was played in 2009 HAVE A LOOK BACK
Thanks again haiku friends for another successful kukaI. Please continue with your after-words here at comments Be safe.
gillena cox (Founder/Co-ordinator Caribbean Kigo Kukai)